The Hardest Parts of Being a New Mom
by Flora Ware
1. The verbal abuse. Perhaps I’m a tad sensitive, but personally, I don’t like it when someone screams at me. Unfortunately, now I have to put up with a boss who, if he gets hungry or cranky, pulls himself up to his full 22-inch height and BELLOWS at me until he’s reddish-purple in the face. To make things more stressful interesting, he and I don’t speak the same language, so I am constantly trying to translate. Usually, what he wants is my breasts, however, which also makes this whole scenario borderline sexual harassment.
2. I am now a 24-hour human buffet. It’s wonderful and all that I can nourish my baby the way nature intended, with the “liquid gold” that flows from my breasts, but wow, it takes up a lot of my day (and night). For someone whose stomach is apparently the size of a walnut, he sure spends A LOT of time eating.
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